Friday, November 18, 2016

Developing Social Skills to keep children SAFE, STRONG, and FREE!
     Last week, CAP counselors met with classes to build safety skills in the event of bullying situations, unsafe strangers, or sexual assault encounters.   To learn more about Child Assault Prevention, please visit www.FrontRangeCAP.org and look for the Parent Resources tab.  

     CAP doesn’t frighten children with horror stories.  But we know that 1 in 3 girls and 1 in 4 boys in the U.S> are sexually assaulted at least once before the age of 18.  CAP was founded on the idea that teaching children strategies such as peer support, self-assertion, and adult support increases a child’s resources for dealing with potentially dangerous situations, and hopefully preventing them from occuring.   CAP also recognizes the role of families in preventing assault & held an informative presentation at NES in advance of meeting with children.

   If you missed the parenting program, here are a few suggestions that were discussed:
1.       Have your child hold up their hand and count on their fingers as you help them brainstorm a list of five trusted adults in their life that they could turn to whenever problems occur in their lives.  BrainWise curriculum refers to these adults as Stars in their personal Constellation of Support.  Consider wise, caring adults in their family, school, church, or neighborhood who will advise and protect them. 

2.      Help children practice mindfully noticing the emotional messages their bodies send to them every day.  When their stomach gets queasy, their muscles tighten, heart rate increases, legs shake, or they begin to sweat, these are Red Flag Warnings telling them to identify their emotion and find ways to address the cause of it.   In BrainWise lessons, children are learning tools for self-regulating their stress, anger, and grief, but if they are in a dangerous situation, these body messages are also a signal to get help from an adult. 

3.      Help children practice using Assertive Communication and I-messages in all situations.  Coach children to reframe aggressive words or restate passive reactions into strong, clear messages. 
4.      Develop a sleepover safety plan with your child.  Always give your child an out if they are feeling uncomfortable.  Let them know that if they call you, you will come and get them. 

5.      Predators can tell if a child has been educated and if parents are paying attention to where their child is, who they are with, and what they are doing.  Predators pay attention to children whose parents aren’t paying attention.

6.       Discuss not sharing personal information with others, in person or over the Internet.  Children should not tell their full names and address to strangers.

7.       Always make a point to have the following discussion in front of your child and the babysitter before leaving a new sitter alone with your children for the first time:  “I know you will do great tonight and follow our family rules.  If anything happens while I’m gone that upsets you, we will talk about it first thing when I get home.”  

8.      Ask a child if they want to give a relative or friend a hug or kiss.  Do not force children to share their bodies with others, even those they love.  Help children know how to be safe, strong, & free!

Ann Sherman, Social Emotional Learning Instructor and Parenting Matters Coordinator at NES

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