Managing Children's Stress Levels

     During BrainWise lessons, we’ve been talking about how to get relief from the stressors we face in our lives.   Fifty percent of adults in the United States indicate that stress keeps them up at night.  Recently, more teenagers indicate feeling higher levels of anxiety.  Even young children mention testing anxieties, fear of the dark or harsh weather, or stress over conflicts with peers.  At NES, we are encouraging young children to notice when their bodies and minds are stressed and then select their favorite stress relief strategies.  If children can learn and practice various relaxation strategies now, they will have a toolbox full of ideas as they face teenage anxieties and adult pressures. 

     Sometimes we don’t even recognize that we are carrying stress around in our stomachs, shoulders, jaws, or chest.  Perhaps you clench your teeth slightly so your jaw feels tight, or maybe your shoulders become sore. Muscle tension can also be associated with backaches and tension headaches. To become aware of where we hold our stress and then to release it, students learned about Progressive Muscle Relaxation.    This technique helps us tense and then relax the various muscles in our body that are holding stress.  The younger kids pretended to squeeze a lemon with their hands, pull in their stomachs to squeeze through a fence, or pull the head of a turtle into its shell to release tension in their shoulders.  You can create a flip book of relaxation techniques for your child at http://www.kimscounselingcorner.com/therapeutic-activities/fun-and-easy-to-make-relaxation-flip-books.  Have fun practicing this strategy with your kids.  Here is an adult version of relaxing each part of your body: 

 One of the body’s reactions to fear and anxiety is muscle tension. This can result in feeling “tense”, or relaxation can lead to muscle aches and pains, as well as leaving some people feeling exhausted. Think about how you respond to anxiety. Do you “tense up” when you’re feeling anxious? Muscle relaxation can be particularly helpful in cases where anxiety is especially associated to muscle tension. This information sheet will guide you through a common form of relaxation designed to reduce muscle tension. 

General procedure: 

1 Once you’ve set aside the time and place for relaxation, slow down your breathing and give yourself permission to relax.

 2 When you are ready to begin, tense the muscle group described. Make sure you can feel the tension, but not so much that you feel a great deal of pain. Keep the muscle tensed for approximately 5 seconds. 

3 Relax the muscles and keep it relaxed for approximately 10 seconds. It may be helpful to say something like “Relax” as you relax the muscle. 

4 When you have finished the relaxation procedure, remain seated for a few moments allowing yourself to become alert. 

Relaxation sequence:
 1. Right hand and forearm. Make a fist with your right hand.
 2. Right upper arm. Bring your right forearm up to your shoulder to “make a muscle”. 
3. Left hand and forearm. 
4. Left upper arm.
 5. Forehead. Raise your eyebrows as high as they will go, as though you were surprised by something. 
6. Eyes and cheeks. Squeeze your eyes tight shut. 
7. Mouth and jaw. Open your mouth as wide as you can, as you might when you‘re yawning. 
8. Neck. !!! Be careful as you tense these muscles. Face forward and then pull your head back slowly, as though you are looking up to the ceiling. 
9. Shoulders. Tense the muscles in your shoulders as you bring your shoulders up towards your ears. 10. Shoulder blades/Back. Push your shoulder blades back, trying to almost touch them together, so that your chest is pushed forward. 
11. Chest and stomach. Breathe in deeply, filling up your lungs and chest with air. 
12. Hips and buttocks. Squeeze your buttock muscles 
13. Right upper leg. Tighten your right thigh. 
14. Right lower leg. !!! Do this slowly and carefully to avoid cramps. Pull your toes towards you to stretch the calf muscle. 
15. Right foot. Curl your toes downwards. 
16. Left upper leg. Repeat as for right upper leg. 
17. Left lower leg. Repeat as for right lower leg. 
18. Left foot. Repeat as for right foot. 

Practice means progress. Only through practice can you become more aware of your muscles, how they respond with tension, and how you can relax them. Training your body to respond differently to stress is like any training – practicing consistently is the key. 

Ann Sherman, Social Emotional Learning Instructor NES,  Parenting Matters Coordinator TEENS, Inc.   ann@teensinc.org    720-561-4861