Andrew Sullivan,
author of I Used to Be a Human,
points out that within the last ten years, the smartphone has invited us to get
lost in information anywhere, at any time.
We have gone from looking up and around to constantly looking down. However, no matter how convenient and accessible technology has
become, it is still our choice whether we remain tethered to it everywhere we
go, says Dr. Brett Kennedy, author of The
Digital Self. Is your
technology impacting your face-to-face time with others or distracting you from
being alone with yourself?
According to attachment theory,
children bond with their caregivers through face to face interaction and
because of the adult’s responsiveness to the child’s emotional state and
needs. But with screens demanding our
constant attention, are children left looking at their parent’s fore heads
rather than receiving our undivided full facial expressions and attention? Are we being mindfully “present” when we
are with our children? As never
before, children are noticing where our attention lies. Research indicates that families who have
meals together most nights of the week are more likely to prevent risky
behavior in their children. Taking time
to connect over food, to laugh and inquire about each other’s day, is a simple
but powerful way to make a huge difference in the lives of our children. But how many family members are now staring
into smartphones at the table and allowing texts and calls to interrupt this
precious family time?
This all led Rachel Macy Stafford at HandsFreeMama.com to make a resolution
this year to mindfully change her priorities and shift her work-life
balance:
I
resolve to make memories, not to-do lists.
I resolve
to feel the squeeze of loving arms, not the pressure of over-commitment.
I resolve
to get lost in conversation with my favorite people, not consumed in a sea of
unimportant emails.
I resolve to
make the noise of my life be a mixture of laughter and gratitude, not the
intrusive buzz of mobile phones and text messages.
I resolve to
let go of distraction, perfection, and pressure – to grasp what really
matters.
My kids are
craving my presence, my connection, my joy and strength. It’s what I’m craving too.
If you have similar concerns, how can you
make an action plan to set digital boundaries at meal time, free up evening
hours for family interaction time, stow away devices while watching your
children perform, or negotiate with work for stricter tech boundaries? This shift may be easier said than
done when employers are demanding access to our lives 24/7. A recent study at CSU found that just
thinking about having to answer work emails at home renders employees
“emotionally exhausted.” Other research suggests that limiting the number of
times a day that we check email or work-chat services (to three or four) cannot
only reduce stress levels but also increase overall productivity. Creating work-life balance to prevent burn out
is as important as preventing the deterioration of strong parent-child
relationships.
Many of us
are in search of balance in this digital age.
Kristin Race from Mindful Life
offers some concrete steps that adults should consider to create tech
boundaries for their own well being and that of their family. There
are easy adjustments we can all make to limit the impact of our smartphones on
our well-being. Follow this link and get started: We have put together some mindful
hacks for mobiles here.
And for more
ideas, please join the discussion about Raising
Kids in a Digital Age this Weds, Feb 15th at 6:00pm at Nederland
High.
Ann Sherman,
Social Emotional Learning Instructor at NES, Parenting Matters Coordinator
TEENS, Inc.
No comments:
Post a Comment